Be Uniquely You

MUSIC: It was a requirement at the end of elementary school to choose an instrument and learn to play it. Granted, I've always liked listening to music. Playing music...not so much. God did not give me that gift, not even a little bit. I remember going into the music room in the 5th grade wing of our school, to pick out an instrument. I wanted to play the trumpet, it seemed fun and upbeat. I can't remember the exact reason, but somehow I ended up being assigned the least coolest instrument in the history of musical instruments...the slide trombone. Looking down and seeing the slide trombone in my hand, it was a non-friendship from the start.  The combination of not wanting to play the trombone, and lacking any musical ability to speak of, made for an interesting year.

Frankly, I despised the brass torture device so deeply, I refused to learn to "read" music. The slide trombone has a lot of downsides, but one cool thing about that particular instrument is, even if you have no clue how to play it, glancing at your neighbor in class who does, is extremely helpful. I can't recall the particular classmate, but I quickly took note that he so apparently knew how to play the trombone, and I so absolutely and apparently did not. So, I turned into a musical copy cat. He pushed the slide out, I pushed the slide out. He pulled the slide in, I pulled the slide in. From the front of the classroom, I would imagine it was somewhat passable that I was participating and playing along nicely.

BOOKS: I've always had a love of reading. In particular, I'm drawn to non-fiction and biographies. I've always been fascinated with how other people have lived their lives. Don't get me wrong, I've led a blessed and wonderful life, but I never found my life particularly note worthy in the grand scheme of things, so to read and learn about historical figures and generationally memorable people, is interesting to me. I think we are often taught by society to look at how others have lived in the past, to see how we should live in the future. It's a look out and a look back, but never a look in or a look up.

CAREER: One of the first pieces of advice I was given when I was leaving law school is "make sure you get a mentor." The idea behind the advice is that a mentor gives you someone to talk to about their experience, someone to watch, someone to emulate. Mentors are great. The are especially great however when they encourage you to be who you are and not who they were. When I graduated and went to work at my first full time legal job, I quickly realized that "forms" were lifesaving. How do I file a motion? Find a form. How should I draft this letter? Find a form. Forms do save time and anxiety, but they also stifle thought, creativity, and uniqueness.

HIKING: Anyone who hikes will tell you to "stay on the trails," and "use the designated paths." This is no doubt sound advice because you could be injured or lost if you deviate from the known route. However, you might find an amazing view you've never seen before if in fact you go your own way.

Giving all of the above their due credit, we have to appreciate and know that God uniquely created us to be exactly who we are. There are no copies. No duplicates. To be clear, no other (insert your name here) will ever walk this Earth. I remember when Amber and I first started dating and I would confide in my mom, my jealousy when other guys at school or at a ballgame would flirt with Amber and show her attention. I had no doubt "out-kicked my coverage," and I was struggling with insecurity and pride. My mom, as she so often does, gave me some wonderful advice and truth. I'll paraphrase what she said to me, followed by a question to answer:
"Adam,
There will always be someone better looking than you
There will always be someone with more money than you
There will always be someone better/more in one way or another
So, stop worrying about others, and stop trying to compete with others.
Do you believe Amber loves you for you?" "Of course I do," I said. "Then, stop worrying about it! There is no one else like you, so no matter how hard someone tries, no matter the situation, Amber will stay with you and she will love you...for you."

My mom told my heart the truth that my immature and jealous mind couldn't come to terms with. I still think of that conversation, mainly when Amber is brushing her beautiful dark hair at the sink beside me, while my belly jiggles as I brush my teeth.
God wants us to know something very important and very powerful, "I LOVE YOU FOR YOU."

So, play the instrument God gave you and don't look to your neighbor, write your own stories, be unique in your career, and blaze a new trail. Be uniquely you.

Much Love, Adam

"Each one should test their own actions. Then they can take pride in themselves alone, without comparing themselves to someone else." —Galatians 6:4 

"Do not conform yourselves to the standards of this world." -Romans 12:2