Just be a brother

Maybe it's a common symptom of being a big brother. Maybe I do the same thing I fuss at my son about. If so, sorry Nick, Delaney, Haley, Andrew, and Allie. Big brothers have a tendency of acting like dads far too often. They confuse their role in the family. They are siblings, not superiors. Age provides wisdom and experience sure, but it never changes the role in a family. My son, JB, is the first born, rule follower, so when he sees, or perceives, his two younger sisters stepping out of line in the least, he lets them know about it.

It's nothing I've taught him, JB just kind of stepped into the role of authoritarian. I've had to remind him multiple times recently, "just be a brother." I know it's coming from a good place. He loves his sisters. He thinks he's helping, but at the end of the day, I'm their father. Shouldn't that be a relief to him? Being a brother is easier after all, no duty to raise another, just to love them and accept them. 

You and I are different, but the commonality I share with each one of you reading this, is that we are brothers and sisters in Christ. We are family. Our Heavenly Father created everything that we are now the beneficiaries of. Like any good Father, he loves me the same as he loves you. He doesn't play favorites and He doesn't delegate his responsibilities to any of his children. Perhaps we are far different in many respects, but I'm not better than you, and you aren't better than me. Our Father loves us the same. We are equals. I’m your brother.

So this is my note to you and a reminder to myself...just be a brother. Don't judge your siblings. There is a judge, our Father, but you aren't Him, and neither am I. Don't reprimand them. Don't talk ill of them. Don't criticize them unnecessarily. What you are called to do, what you are created to do...is to love. Just love. That’s it. Thats easy, right? Can you feel the burden lifted? Sure, we should speak truth and grace to others we care about from time to time. Maybe they are leading a life that we know to be harmful to them, but in the end, you'll reach them with love, not mandates...with acceptance, not judgment. So take off the robe, just be a brother. 

If someone talks differently, love them. If someone looks differently, love them.  If someone leads a lifestyle different from yours, love them. Politics, geography, race, sexual orientation, social status are just a few examples of what separates us, but we are more alike than we are different. We have the same Father. Our Father loves us, and He loves when His children love each other.

You aren't called to judge, to condemn, to hate, to ridicule, to discipline, or to belittle. Just love. I'm certain our Father appreciates your concern, but don't confuse your role in our family, just be a brother. 

Much love, Adam

*"Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a liar. For whoever does not love their brother and sister, who they have seen, cannot love God, who they have not seen." And he has given us this command: Anyone who loves God must also love their brother and sister." 1John 4:20-21
"Keep on loving one another as brothers and sisters."-Hebrews 13:1
"Brothers and sisters, do not slander one another. Anyone who speaks against a brother or sister or judges them speaks against the law and judges it. When you judge the law, you are not keeping it, but sitting in Judgment on it." -James 4:11
"Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How you can say to your brother "Let me take the speck out of your eye" when all the time there is a plank in your own eye?" -Matthew 7:3-4
"Look how good and how pleasant it is when brothers live together in unity." -Psalm 133:1

Comments

  1. np41781June 28, 2018 at 4:21 PM

    Excellent post Adam! As an older brother, I am guilty of this far too often. Even though I don't agree with how my sibling lives their life, I should lead by example not through dictation. Thank you for your words brother. Nathan

    ReplyDelete

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